i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
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