Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Randomize
