I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize