Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize