Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
