Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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