If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
