I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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