I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
...so i touched it.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
