His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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