If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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