I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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