Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
