Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Randomize
