allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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