It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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