morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
