I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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