awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
