Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize