hell yes lets make some ravioli
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
