Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Randomize
