Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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