If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
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And to think..we used to do everything sober...
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
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How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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