idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
