the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
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