theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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