Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I think people are normalizing furries
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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