remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
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