Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Randomize
