woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
