IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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