How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
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