The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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