Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
