We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
