We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
