is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Less talking, more tequila
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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