I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
