as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
