btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Randomize
