The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize