I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
