i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
