yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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