I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
