You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize