she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
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