Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
please don't ironically join a cult
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