theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize