I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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