I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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